Day 2/3

Yesterday was great. Except for 3 hours of going over our manual. I've met all the other students and they are great. I wish I could write a detailed description of what it's like here but it's difficult to convey. They say that these 5 months are a pressure cooker/greenhouse environment, which means that it is an intense time for fast growth. If you add all the hours of our sessions, quiet time, small time, and worship then it's the equivalent to 4 years of going to church on wednesday night and sunday. Crazy! haha Everything is intense here. For example our DTS leader, John Murphy, told his testimony and I'm pretty sure most people were crying or tearing up. I love it here.

God is so amazing!!! Yesterday afternoon I kept thinking there is no way that I can be here for 5 months! I wanted to come home really badly. I felt like I was thrown in the huge mess and I was overwhelmed. So I recruited everyone to pray for me and things took a complete 180. So many confirmed that my fears and feeling of being overwhelmed were normal. He brought people to encourage me and to tell me exactly what I needed to here. I couldn't be more happy about it! And even now I just talked to two people in my school. Praise God, seriously. I know I'm going to have my rough days but He is all I need. I think I'm going to learn that the hard way. Thank you all so much for praying!!

Ok, Day one... could be better. I know it'll take time to get in the swing of things. I'm just trying to be this friendly outgoing person and I think I'm trying to hard. I don't know. I'll write more later, friends.

A storm is raging outside. I haven't seen one like this since my florida hurricane days. I jumped into bed with meg knowing she'd be awake and she goes "it's kinda scary". I love it.... but it is kinda scary. ; ) I woke to a loud BOOM outside my window. Enjoying seeing the flash and waiting for the noise, I realized my dogs were absolutely 100% terrified of thunderstorms. have to go to bed.... my mom said to. Night... hope my flight isn't delayed

Countdown over

Tomorrow I start my new life. I'm a little anxious. Thats normal right? Seriously this just doesn't feel real. I won't forget any of you! I love you all! Updates will hopefully come tomorrow. Can't wait to tell you all about it!

I'm done packing!!! Praise God!

3

I have no idea why I was so tired yesterday. Perhaps because I was tempted with a nap for 2 hours but never got to have the pleasure of taking one. At 7:30 I told myself I would try to keep my eyes open till 9. I made it and at exactly 9 I crashed. 10 hours of precious sleep! Sorry working friends.... I guess that's everyone except me. I woke up and cleaned out my room. Took everything that need to be packed and put it in the bonus room. So far my toiletry bag is packed. I need my mom to pack. Yes, I'm a baby and can't pack on my own....... or at least I can't pack on my own for 5 months!! Boo hoo Why isn't this real yet!? I'm so ok right now. haha I know that is a blessing so why am I complaining? oh well Day 3 has just started.

4

With only four days left, I've barely thought about leaving today. I've been way too busy to let my mind wander there. Also, I didn't really want my mind to wander there. haha Tomorrow is packing day. I want to skip packing day. Ugh, I don't want to lie to myself and think i'll be able to fit everything I want to take in my bags. Wow, still not real.

I'm glad Tanya is home and telephone accessable! (sp?)

5

First tears of the week.... I guess it was kind of dumb to write goodbye letters to my family.... opps

6

What Jen is thinking according to me......

-I'm so jealous of Britt's new shirt and jacket! I'm going to steal it while she's sleeping.
- OLIVE GARDEN, BLAH!!!
- I wish harrison wasn't playing this stupid golf game
- I need to have a good cry... ("call the wambulance" thinks me)
- I don't want to go back to work!
- Bah, my brain is mush.... I'm surprised I'm thinking this many thoughts.

Hope you enjoyed

7

I was babysitting today and these conversations stuck in my head. : )

Drew-6 Adam-8 Connor-8

Drew: "Why are japenese beatles here?"
Drew: "How did they get from japanese?"

Connor: "What's the difference between japan and China?"
Me: "They're just 2 different countries?"
Adam: "Japan has ninjas, china doesn't"
Connor: "china has ninjas!"
Adam: "Ok but not as many as Japan" ( or Japanese)

8

I'm refuse to say goodbye to anyone! I hate goodbyes. I left church early today because we were having a cookout for a family that is moving away and I didn't want to see the farewell. Yah, that is probably really selfish but whatever.

On a happier note, I'm going white water rafting! Yay! It's gonna be fun!

Countdown from 9

I leave in 9 days. To my surprise I feel nothing. I'm neither excited nor scared. I keep saying to myself that this can't possibly be real. I've been dreaming about these days for so long that I don't know what to do with them. These months were supposed to be preparation for this trip. Am I prepared? I don't know. Maybe that's not for me to worry about. I guess I could have done more. Read more books or prayed more but I guess I can't change anything now. Yes, I'm ready. Or rather, I have to be. 9 days is a very short time. Harrison needs the computer. bye

Microscopic Work

I deleted the post I wrote a few days ago. Besides being a very emotional ( which I try not to be) post, I have also not stopped thinking about it. One thought has been coming up a bit in different books I've been reading and I felt very convicted that there was much false assumption in that blog about my future. I said that I thought I do the "crazy things of this world" and do "big things" Who am I to assume that God is going to use me for something "big"? I am just a servant. I can demand no great recognition or calling. The thought that has been making it's ugly head known these past 2 days is "being content with the small things" Finding satisfaction in doing the repetative daily tasks of life. I flipped open "irresistable revolution" to the place where Shane Clairborne goes to India to minister to the poorest of the poor. He says quite perfectly, " While the temptation to do great things is always before us, in Khalighat i learened the discipline of doing the small things with great diliberation" Uh oh, Is God trying to tell me that I'm going to be washing dishes in a hut in Africa or serving food to the hungry without gratitude for the rest of my life? Hmm I don't know but I have decided (and I think it is a choice) that I am going to find joy, satisfaction, and purpose in whatever I do..... big or microscopic.

"We can do no great things, just small things with great love. It is not how much you do, but how much love you put into doing it." Mother Teresa

This is so flipping cute!

Glasses

I'm so excited! I ordered my new glasses today! They are green and black........ and exactly the same ones as Jens. Sorry jen. lol I love them.

Info

Ok, so I leave in 18 days.... wow! I just got off the phone with the director of my school. Apparently I'll be joining 20-25 other people in Denver then after that India. Once I get to Denver I will find out what my options for my outreach in India are. I decide which one by the work they'll be doing. Really, I still have no idea what it's going to be like. I'll be attending a global conference in India. I'll be meeting people from all over the world. The purpose of the conference is to decipher what God is doing in Asia and in our lives. This is a once in a lifetime thing. What a blessing! I'll update you when I get more info.

T&M

I miss my friend. Especially today. We have not talked in 4 days. This hasn't happened for a while. She is in Spain. While I do not see her on a regular basis (she lives, what feels like, forever away.... Florida lol), I do talk to her at least once a day sometimes more. I have news to tell her and along with my sister she is my "person". My "person" is the person who makes things real. Meg and Tanya verify what is actually happening with their excitement. Telling them is what makes the news come to life. I've only told one of them and I need to tell the other. It's funny how I've told so many people and everyone is excited yet I won't be content until giving her the news. Wow, this sounds pretty gay as I read over it but we're just really good friends haha. You wish you were as close to your friends!! Bitter comments done..... bye

India

I'm going to India!! More details later!

Grown-ups

Regardless of the fact that it has been an amazing week, I feel pretty down. I just got off the phone with one of my best friends from Florida. I guess the last time I talked to her was 3 or 4 months ago. It's just hard to realize that we all went our separate ways and we're fine without one another. Seeing how our lives have panned out and how we're doing the things we've always dreamed about is just weird. So so weird. I guess relationships grow and die sometimes. I suppose we'll always have the bond of sharing our past secrets with one another. That is something that builds such trust and I think we'll always be able to ask those personal questions and expect honest answers. Again I say it and everytime it's a little more heartbreaking. Why does everyone have to grow up?