In detail for Tanya : )

Today has been a great day. So Lauren Johnson calls me this morning at 7 saying her maid of honor is super sick and she needs somebody to go to the spa with her. Of course I say yes. A free day at the Ballantyne resort? Heck ya! Now I guess if you know me you wouldn't think I was quite the spa type. Harrison told my mom that I was probably having a moral conflict with it. All the materialism and excess..... but I went anyway. I mean if I hadn't have gone then Lauren would have gone by herself since they couldn't cancel the appointments. So with the fact the I'm not the "spa type" in your heads let me share my experiences.

First thing we do is go to the locker room where there is a robe (it's like a giant blanket that weighed 10lbs) waiting for us. We get in our robes and go sit in a room with a whole bunch of other silent robed ladies in comfy chairs with magazines. Seeing the trend, we grab a magazine and a chair and wait for our name to be called. Our turn comes and they lead us into a room where we had our "couples" massage lol. This was amazing. I was super oily afterwards though. We walked back (very wobbly from being massaged into mush) and waiting for the next treatment.

Ok this one was an experience. The lady leads me into this room were there is this hard table that has like drain things on the side so they can spray it down. This should have been my first indicator that something very unnatural (at least to me) was going to happen. She says she's going to leave the room and I need to lay under this towel (I think Lauren said hand towel lol) This was very awkward trying to get this tiny towel to cover me where I wanted to be covered. Lauren said she thought surely the lady must have meant there was another blanket under the towel but no there was not. Finally covered, she walks back in and takes off half the towel that I so strategically placed. I don't know why people pay for this but she gets this body sugar/salt and very painfully scrubs what feels like all my skin off. This lady has seen more of me than most. We were talking which, again, was awkward and I thought about inviting her to church but I'm not sure I ever want to see her again after all she has seen of me. After being throughly scrubbed down and lotioned up we head back to await our last treatment.

We had a facial next. I'm pretty sure I was inwardly chuckling for the first 15 minutes. I get in there and she pulls this big thing over (kind of looks like a dentist tray and light). She turns on this steam shooter and aims it directly at my face. Surely this can't be right, I think. I can't breath. The steam smells like crap and it's being shot directly at my face. (lauren said she tried to inconspicuously move out from under it haha) Somehow I got used to it as she started rubbing cream on my face then taking it off then putting more on then taking it off. This went on for a little while. With one facial mask on, she massages my hands and then puts them in plastic bags that go up to my elbow. (what?!) Then she puts giant heated oven mitts over that. I felt like a seal. Apparently I got my zits popped by a professional. I though surely there must be a more high tech way to do it then just popping them with your fingers. I mean, I love popping my zits. I don't want somebody else to do it. Actually I didn't know i had any until she shined the light from heaven (or at least if felt like that) on my face. After this came the giant face buffer (reminded me exactly of that brush that tickles your teeth at the dentist) Yah, that was weird to. After this is a blur. I fell into a very deep peaceful sleep. This post is super long so all this to say the spa was fun. : )

Highlights

I could write many many paragraphs about how awesome this weekend was but I'll just give some of my favorite highlights.

One of my favorite moments was when I got home from hiking ( a post in itself ) my family and the kirks were all out at the hottub. As I came through the door, they all smiled and asked how my day was. I love feeling loved. I remembered how awesome it was to have the whole family together again. While sitting in the bonus room my parents said they wanted to see me and heather's moves on the exercise balls. (they have heard us laughing and hitting the floor up there for months) Gladly we started rolling and falling all over the floor. Loving the attention, Me, Heather, and Harrison gladly entertained the rest of the family. After the ball fun we just sat around the bonus room laughing and talking. I thought "This is the life".

Another moment was reaching the top of Crowders mountain. After a pretty strenuous hike and after tripping a few times (mostly me), we made it. It was so worth it. We layed on edge of the cliff with our faces hanging over the side. The breeze blowing up the cliff face was heavenly. I could have layed there for hours. It was a surreal day.

This moment might have made me the happiest of the whole weekend. I was with the Kennedy girls and we went to On The Run for some coffee. I had a caffiene headache and once I got in the car I had an incomparable happiness with the cup of steaming coffee in my hand. I sat there smiling for no particular reason. Yes, I suppose this make me an addict but how can something that makes me so happy be a bad thing?

TheParty

Tonight was surreal. I'm speechless...... well almost. It was so weird having 30 people whom I love all at my house to celebrate me. I dreaded the opening of the presents and everyone staring at me. Then everyone started giving advice/encouragement/compliments. My heart was overwhelmed. I felt almost guilty getting all this praise. I know 100% that it is only by the grace of God that I want to do His will. I don't deserve to love Him or know Him yet I've been so blessed. I'm just joyful tonight. Wow......what a night...

Weekend

As I sit here munching on my oatmeal I think about the awesomeness of this long weekend.

-My graduation party is tonight. The Gillming School for the Exceptionally Gifted is proud to have me as their valedictorian. ; )

-Saturday is SNL, the church's high school service.

-I may be making a proposal dinner for friends! How romantic haha

-Church on Sunday is outside! I'm the designated cameralady.

-I think monday might be hiking at Crowders Mountian. I love hiking and I love Crowders mountain so this should be fun.

-Harrison gets home from roadtripping!

Oatmeal done so I guess this post should be too.

Ride

Yesterday I realized I just need to enjoy life. I can't get bogged down with lies that invade my mind. While reading in John I read, "Do not let your hearts be troubled" I realized that I am allowing my heart to be troubled. There has to be a decision to give that burden to God and not hold onto it for self pity's sake. If I can't get my act together now while I'm not busy then life is going to be out of control when my life is super busy. That was the wise advice of my friend Tanya. Like my dad always says, "Enjoy the ride".

??

Questions:

How can I possibly be leaving in 34 days?

Is there any way in the world that I'm going to be able to fit 5 months of clothes, sheets, a blanket, a sleeping bag and a sleeping bag pad into 2 medium suitcases?

What country will I be spending 7 weeks in?

How do I go 5 months without everyone in Charlotte?

Where is my brown jacket?

Why does my dog scratch my face?

All great questions..... Wish I knew the answers! : )

Gift

I recieved what I believe to be the greatest gift I've ever been given yesterday. My kindred spirit, bosom buddy, life partner haha, best friend, whatever you wanna call it, gave me about 100 photocopied pages of her prayer journal. It has over a months worth of journaling from when she went to Rhwanda and when she was really seeking God's peace. To be given something so intimate is absolutely priceless in my eyes. To read such raw honesty and emotion is beautiful. : ) I can't wait to read it all.

Love

"I'm in love, I'm in love and I don't care who knows it!" -Buddy the Elf

Cheesy, yes, but I am in love with Jesus! This has been a great weekend when I expected such turmoil. As we were singing "I can't stop falling in love with you. I'll never stop falling in love with you.", I truly meant it. He renewed my heart and attitude this week when I know that I don't deserve to even be thought about. Wow, I'm just joyful right now. I think the puzzle of my future is slowly being put together as I learn more about myself. This excites me more than anything. The whole world is an option. Nothing is holding me back. I wish everyone knew that they are the only thing holding themselves back from all the God has for them. Ok, not that everyone desires to travel the world but I'm upset when people settle. Don't settle!... Even after you get married. Life doesn't have to end unless you let it. Ok, rant over. So is this post.

Lynchburg

At points I wanted to shoot myself but 5 hours later we're finally here. Four grandparents.....Three losing their hearing..... Everyone talking extremely loud.......Wow. I don't know what I would have done without my ipod. We ate at the sketchiest restaraunt ever. We were the only white people and they opened up the back section of the restaraunt (which was completely empty) and made us sit there. I think I experienced my first instance of segragation. haha It was called Stephanies 2. I don't know where Stephanies 1 was but I don't think I'd want to go there either. We ate there because we couldn't find the elusive Cracker Barrel. Fast food was out of the question as my grandma made VERY clear. Oh well, I'm not complaining. Ok ok, I guess I am. It's just been a surreal 2 days.

haha We're watching Futurama. It's the one where Fri sells his hands to the devil.

Granola

I'm not competive but ,man, do I love to win!

Loss

For 7 years our tuesday nights have been spent with our friends.

We laughed with them and cried with them.

Tonight we parted and I feel as though my friend has died.

They shall be greatly missed and our tuesday nights will never be the same.

Rest in Peace Gilmore Girls. : ((

Faux work

I am sitting at my desk in the church offices with not much to do. So far I have written 2 letters and talked to a disgruntled lady (ok, she wasn't disgruntled but that sounds more exciting that reality) I sit here typing away so the sound the keyboard (which is very loud) will fool the staff members into thinking I am doing actual work. Hopefully they don't read this post for many weeks. : ) I guess I thought there would be more work for me to do but there really isn't. I am waiting for all the connection cards to get in so I can do real work. Till then I shall sit and look very busy.

Clarity

Take 2 on today's post:

Rough start this morning..... and afternoon. Yet again, God is so so faithful. When I least expected it He whispered truth to me that gave me such freedom. I am free from all worry and sorrow. If something isn't working out the way I want then I know it's not God's plan for my life. Why shed one tear or waste one thought on what I cannot change? I am free!! What a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! And what clarity a nap and running can bring!

: )

This has been a great great day!
-I went to the dump with my dad. This doesn't sound like fun but it was great to just sit and talk with him.
-Farmers market trip with my friend katie. I bought a cherry tomato plant! : )))
-Iced coffee with Katie. mmmmmmmm
-PIT winner. (funnest game ever)
-Frisbee
-Pool with the boys. Almost drowned above water but fun nonetheless. ; )
-I topped it all off with a nap.
It's only 5. The day isn't even close to being over. I'm feeling like it's only going to get better.

potatoes

I wrote a blog but deleted it. I decided I couln't waste such a good picture on such a stupid blog. But I suppose this post is worse. ehhh whatever.

I left the original title to verify that the deleted post didn't have much potential. haha

Is This For Real?

It's all coming together. Plane tickets bought yesterday. Arrival information sent out today. Wow. In 45 days I will be on a plane getting pysched up for the biggest adventure so far in my short life. Oh, I am so excited. I've probably said that a million time but it is true.

babysitting

I'm sitting in a big empty house watching the disney channel eating grape nuts with rice milk. I bet you envy me.

Locker Room

Awkward Moment of the Day (perhaps the entire year)

After I took a cycle class at the gym I sat down in front of a mirror in the locker room to french braid my hair. I just learned how to do it so it took a really long time. I noticed as I was taking my time french braiding a lady came up behind me. She went to her locker and got some clothes out. The next time I looked up I saw everything...... yes, everything of this woman.... this old woman. (Imagine me gagging inwardly) Instantly I look down and take my hair out to start agian to give her more time to get dressed before I make the mistake of looking up again. She was like 2 feet away from me! Who does that? She must have been a confident lady or something. Ugh. wow. Eventually I got the nerve to stand up and walk very quickly out of the locker room. I hope this is as awkward as it gets.

Wind

Today has been good. My sister was in a great mood. I wasn't so much. She kept trying to cheer me up but I wasn't budging. After my cure-all nap, the world was a happy place again. We drove to Walmart with the new relient k CD blasting and the windows down. This has to be one of my favorite things in life. Driving on a hot day with the wind blowing my hair and screaming to my favorite music. We just had to make a trip by sonic. My sister is funny. She refers to our sonic drinks as "special treats" to her boyfriend in a little voice. Everything is grand and romantic with Megan. I think life has a lovely tint in the eyes of megan. The world is beautiful and inspiring to her. She is my best friend. If only life could just stop here for a little while. Why do we have to grow up?

bob lob law

There is nothing like a good friend. While talking to one of my closest friends about marriage we decided that we pretty much have a great marriage. We know that the other loves us even if we don't talk for a week. We know that we think each other are beautiful even if it's not spoken. We know we're valued without the constant need to be around one another. I know it's probably just that the expectations of a romantic relationship and friend relationship are very different. Marriage has seemed less and less desirable in my mind recently. Some of the only two people who do it right (in my opinion) that I know are my parents. Thats not a great figure considering all the married couples I know. I guess the fact that I know what I want and don't want now will help me later. I will not settle. I guess that's all I'm trying to say. That and my security will only ever come from God. Just how I don't rely on this friend for my worth, I will not rely on a guy. God is the center. I hope I never loose perspective.

Ready

We're going to lynchburg. I'm ready to go. Also....

52 days!!!!! till I'm leaving for Denver! I'm even more ready to go there. These next 2 months of waiting are going to be rough. But hopefully they'll be fun...